[Bernetini69]

While Benitez continues to resemble a mad chef - throwing ingredients together, making frantic hand gestures, sporting a silly beard - the people of Croxteth, Toxteth and Bootle are listening to hardcore rap music (possibly one of Rooney's illegal mixtapes) and hoping that their beloved Reds sort it out in Europe. Losing at home to Marseille won't have gone down at all well, so it's high time Rafa got the fans back on side. Playing Torres from the start might help. But will they do it, or might Benitez suffer a drive-by?

» Besiktas have played English teams six times in the last ten years, drawing twice, losing three times, and winning once - 2-0 against Chelsea at Stamford Bridge, 2003. With ten men.

» In those six games, they have only managed to score a total of three goals (0.5 per game), whilst conceding eleven (1.8).

» The two draws came at home to Bolton (1-1, 2005) and Leeds (0-0, 2000), while the losses were at the hands of Leeds (6-0, 2000), Chelsea (2-0 in Turkey, 2003) and Spurs (2-0 in Turkey, 2006).

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[goldenHuddlestone]

And look they failed how amusing